The Bands Of Mourning

A Very Bad Day.

It was a beautiful day this morning so I decided to take a walk down the street to the local coffee shop. I had just celebrated my tenth year in Calgary and I was feeling really happy. I took a step out the door saw my neighbor and waved hello. It was then that I was shot in the head.

            That was the beginning of my bad day.

            I could feel it when the ambulance picked me up and placed me into the car. Luckily they pronounced me dead at the scene. If they had taken me to the hospital it would have just caused more questions that nobody could answer. I could hear the police question my neighbors but I found out later that it was just attributed to a drive-by. Somebody must have paid them off. A drive-by usually needs a car. There were none that day.

I woke up in the morgue a few hours later. I had been brought here after the incident. Not the first time I`d woken up in a place like this. “Dammit! I really liked that place. It was so dull and relaxing. I can`t go back now.” Nothing destroys people`s minds like a dead person coming back.

I sat up and thought about what had brought me here. Centuries ago I had discovered the Tree of Life. Possibly eons ago, I forget exactly when I drank from the nectar. However what I can tell you is that I gained immortality that day. I cannot die and I`ve been shot, stabbed, beheaded, burned and more. I was tired of everything and fed up with having nothing of my own so I decided to settle down and for 10 long years it was bliss.

I suppose it is possible for me to die but until I figure out what it is I will enjoy my life as much as possible.

I got off the table and started searching for any clothes. In the medical examiners room I found everything I needed to walk out the front door without getting arrested. Under the last item was a note.

“If you don`t want to get shot in the head again meet me at this place in 5 hours after you wake up.” There was an address underneath.

“I thought it was too easy. Suppose I`d better check it out. Nothing better to do now.” After many centuries I often talked to myself. It was easier than making new friends.

So walking out the front door I went off towards the address on the note. If nothing else I could find out what they knew about me and maybe find some way to pay them back for disrupting my life.

A few hours later I was at a big house tucked away in one of the richest parts of the city. I had circled the outside but found nothing so I rang the bell. The door opened but nobody came out.

“Hello? Anybody home? Olly Olly oxen free.”

Nothing. I decided to go into the house. Inside the door I saw a wheelchair and a very old woman sitting in it. She had a shotgun pointed directly at my chest,

“If you know who I am that won`t do any good. I take it you had me shot.”

“That’s right, but think of it as an invitation to my party.” she said. The voice was rough and strained but for some reason I could have sworn I knew it.

She raised the shotgun and beckoned me to follow her. I may be a bastard but I don`t exactly attack old ladies. I didn`t offer to push her however and she never asked me to.

In the next room there was tea and cookies laid out on a tray. “Please help yourself” so I sat down and grabbed a cookie. My sweet tooth had been calling ever since I woke up.

“Why did you shoot me in the head?”

“It was the only way to get your attention. I`d tried several times to get you to come meet me but you rejected everything I`d sent you.”

“Those were from you? I just assumed they were junk mail.”

“I need your help Mr. Smith. There is something I need you to do for me. It`s very important and I need it before I die.”

“Hold it right there. I cannot give you my immortality. I`ve tried before to pass it on but it never works. I can`t do more than heal up a few cuts and scrapes.”

“That’s fine. I don`t want it. What I do want is for you to get the Beatles back together.”

“Huh?”

“Just kidding, what I really wanted was for you to fight the monster in the garden.” She said this was all seriousness.

“Okay I think I`ll be going now.” She was crazy

“Please wait a few minutes. I will try to explain everything.” A new voice came from another room.

“Please forgive my grandmother. She has a few problems.” A young man came from the living room. He was wearing a suit and glasses. A businessman.

“My name is Rodger. This is my grandmother June. What we would like you to do Mr. Smith is find for us the Tree of Knowledge. There are some questions my grandmother would like to ask it.”

The Tree of Knowledge? “You would be better off looking for the Tree`s avatar.”

“If we could find her we wouldn`t have resorted to shooting you in the head now would we.”

That`s true. I thought about the request. I`ve met the Tree of Knowledge`s avatar many centuries ago. I thought it was a he, but he just said she. They must change every so often. However it didn`t really interest me.

“Sorry. There`s nothing you have that I want. I`m going to go deal with the mess you left my life in.”

“How about answers to why you`re here. Wouldn`t that be worth the risk?”

“Not really.” I`ve already made peace with my life and what I`m doing here.

“What about the chance for an adventure?”

“I`ve had enough adventure to fill a hundred books. Not interested. Sorry.”

“How about the complete set of Xena Warrior Princess DVS`s?” said the old woman.

“Now you`re talking. If you can throw in the complete Star Trek series from the original to the newest one I will do what I can.”

“It`s a deal.” She spit in her hand and held it out. I spit in mine and we shook on it. Her grandson stood in the corner looking a little shell-shocked.

“Okay, DVD`s it is. I don`t understand why but you take what you`ve been given.” He just didn`t get it. After centuries of having to deal with the world`s problems just having time to do nothing was a luxury that this era had in abundance.

What was really interesting me however was how they knew about me. So I asked them point blank to tell me everything they knew.

The old woman smiled and said “I know everything about you Johnny. You came into my life many years ago and changed it for the better. I may not be able to live forever but I`ve had a longer life than most.”

That`s when I recognized her. The last time I`d seen her was when I was going off to war. She was the love of my life in that time and I had shared with her some of my secrets.

I remembered the day in 1910. She had been walking down the street when a car came out of nowhere and plowed right into her. It kept going but I was nearby. I didn`t know her but I tried to save her life by giving her some of my blood. It has excellent healing properties. It worked and she recovered. I helped her back to her farm and stayed there for a few days helping her with everything. That soon turned into a few years and I fell in love. Not the first time.

I stayed there till the war started and had no choice but to join because of the draft. I was sent overseas and my battalion came under heavy fire. When I was killed in combat I decided to let her go. In my long life I`ve loved many women but usually I can`t stand to see them die of old age. I guess it makes me weak.